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Quick, Catholic Guide to Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Infant Loss

By Anonymous (and friends)

Someone close to us miscarried their dear son. As they were stricken with grief, they had many urgent questions. How do we honor our child? How do we find the remains? Can we/should we baptize or call a priest? Do we prepare baby for burial ourselves?  Where can we bury? Is it appropriate to have a funeral?  At what gestational age does someone do this, or do that?  What if we don't have the remains?  If this happens often, why haven’t we been taught what to do?

What these loving parents needed was a quick, clear, researched walk-through of their upcoming decisions - all in one view - regarding medical protocol, burial logistics, emotional support and teachings of the Catholic Church. They wanted to treat their dear child with dignity, they needed good information so they could act with confidence, and they hoped to do all they could for the eternity of their baby. They desired to be at peace - now and into the future. It's a lot to sort through. Yes there are books and blogs, websites and Canon Law, but that takes time. Sadly, miscarriages are common, and yet so many of us mothers and fathers have not been instructed what to do in an emergency.  As a good and holy priest stated– “You can't do what you don't know.”

As we live in a culture that permits abortion, we must be willing to provide good example and bring attention to the dignity of every life.  As parents, we can talk openly - by name – about our littlest children whose smiles are known to God alone.  As Catholics, we need to inform ourselves what the Church teaches regarding the administration of baptism - conditionally or absolutely. As Christians, we should be prepared to usher souls into eternal life - no matter the stage, if God so wills it.   

Please visit www.CatholicMiscarriage.org and download the Quick, Catholic Guide to Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Infant Loss.  I pray it can be used to educate young adults, newlyweds, parents and priests. The guide is prepared as a tri-fold brochure in a simple, PDF format to ensure easy printing at home, or to inexpensively copy and distribute in parishes and hospitals.  Being pro-life means celebrating and grieving life in all its forms.